If you're really into hairy Serbian chicks, Cleveland has a lot to offer(216): We're going to cougar night, the serbian chicks are the best aged.
The pirates hijacked 3 more ships today!!
we need a boat to join in
Obama is on top of it we'd get killed within mins, but we'd live in legend foreva
playing new game: drink everytime u see someone at the beach with a tramp stamp, double if u guess it before u see it, triple for male tramp stamps
warning: blackouts possible when playing in ocean city or anywhere in new jersey
If God had a period, it would result in diet faygo redpop
Just witnessed a walk of shame by a guy in a half gorilla suit. It's going to be a good day.
I told you it's awful. It looks like he was eating honey at a barbershop and tripped.
i'm sitting pantsless eating potato chips and watching porn before he picks me up for our date. I hope he's ready for this...
in hindsight, the duct tape banana hammock was a bad idea.
I didn't think it was possible, but that girl next door is even louder when drunk.
Maid of honor is brides sister and single. Likes lemondrops. You're welcome.
Wash that dress asap. You laid down on the kitchen floor and tried to sweep the floor with your body.
I have not carelessly put myself in herpes way since I got a clean bill of health tyvm.
Your mother liked my album on facebook that's only filled with drunk pictures. I don't know what to feel about this
Breakfast of champions
Is that a dick crepe?
It is indeed
Just reintroduced tequila back into my life...so that's happening
YAS SHES BACK AND BETTER THAN EVER
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