dude i totally did the walk last night came out of her room to see her dad sitting there straight lookin at me...wtf
i just caught my roommate coming out of the bathroom half naked with a surge protector. he told me he didn't wanna talk about it.
MIND BOGGLER: batman and jesus are the same person. Think about it.
Go for the frenulum. Its like eating a popsicle. They go nuts with that shit.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It went from "haha, this will be funny" to "full blown anime porn fetish"
My fave moment of today was you sitting in a hot pink innertube puking into the ocean in front of a lot of children. i would have held your hair back but the ocean did it for you.
a search helicopter?!
life is no where near the amusement park it was when I was on Vicodin.
at which point he tried to give himself a prince albert piercing with the stapler on his desk.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I can't wait for paintbang. I'm going to throw a marker at a child. There will be bail money in my backpack in m trunk. Don't use it on beer.
I feel like we should actually go to church one of these days to thank god for saving us from herpes and babies.
Just once I'd like to do blow in a nice bathroom.
I just mixed tangerine juice with sauv blanc. on an unrelated note, my episide of intervention is slated to run in April.
Get over here and bring your drill!!! The strippers next door need help installing a stripper pole by their pool
Our livers get a hall pass for 2020, right?
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