yeah, we don't understand. the wings losing for guys is like girls finding objects in their body..just weird and sad
Would you want me to push you down the stairs OR throw you a baby shower?? Real talk
He looks like Ryan Reynolds from this angle
Since when is drunk an angle?
I don't know if it's lucky or if it really just makes my tits look THAT good, but I've never NOT gotten laid with this bra on
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Discovered that a nalgene holds an entire bottle of wine. Going mobile. Come find me.
The two girls sitting next to me are asking siri "Like, uh, how do you know my name?". Do I fuck with them or fuck them?
You know you need to take better care of yourself when shaving reminds you of sheep shearing...
Well, I made it all the way to the gas station. And from there, I begged a cab driver who was parked outside, to give me a piggy back ride the final 2 blocks to my apartment. I wasn't in the cab. Didn't have to pay. Drunk me is smart, and very lazy.
I feel violated by Miley Cirrus's performance in the VMA's.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You told me that you would let her eat cake off of your ass, then fell asleep on the floor
I'm getting paid to get fucked up. How much better could this get?
the last thing is remember is that strange guy in the leotard...i woke up in my bed, naked, with a half eaten grilled cheese on my nightstand, a six pack in the fridge, a new pack of cigarettes on my pillow and coke in my purse. apparently i bought some drugs, shopped and cooked. typical.
When I meet her I'm going to have to resist the urge of saying "hey! We're Eskimo sisters!"
Humming the Indiana Jones theme song as my hand makes its way to his dick.
I am that special "drink water and be grateful I'm alive" kind of hungover
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