I just woke up. In the port-o-potty next to our tailgate. an hour after the game started. explain.
There's a man in a pair of gray footie pajamas and a paper crown watching the kids at the playground. It was easier to tell who was a pedophile before Where the Wild Things Are came out.
I asked about his 3 inch scar on his chest. It's from when he had to castrate a bull on the estancia. Apparently this is how good bull meat is made.
her name was charlotte except you kept calling her chatroulette and yelling at her to show you her boobs
Should I mail that cop his nightstick or just throw it away?
I know what youre going to say and vodka only explains half of my sitation
Haha pretty bummed I didn't stay night yesterday after the bj fest you described
Pierced my own nipple last night, and yes everyone did go absolutely nuts
If by "Are you drunk?" you mean "Did you just faceplant in the checkout line at Target?" the answer is yes.
He's beautiful. His facial hair makes me wanna cum in it
Ew, no. But yeah I feel the same
I'll give you some choices for what to get me for Christmas. 1.You naked. 2.You naked 3.You naked.
The last thing I remember is him yelling from across the room "WE FINISHED THE HANDLE!"
It was 11pm.
My mind's like "He's a sexist pig" but my uterus is like "YOU SHALL BEAR HIM STRONG CHILDREN"
I love how when they see that I'm upset their initial response is to offer me ecstasy
You can't hold me to anything I said last night; I was drunk on orgasms.
Randomize