So I think we're almost at the age where we should start calling boys men. Now what age do they start living up to the new title?
Most never. Some around 65.
why im i the only drunk person in the library?
never trust anyone who drives a pt cruiser.... write that down
this study room smells like vodka
the study room thinks the same about you
They were lying down in the parking garage pretending to be speed bumps...
Alright, so what's my next move? I already posted a Milli Vanilli video on her wall
Was rudely woken up by strangers at 4:15am. I was leaning against the stoplight at 9th
You have no idea what this goes for my ego. I literally made you cum in your sleep.
Good morning! Just thought I'd give you my yearly reminder that we lost our virginities 7 years ago, yesterday.
That's the best creepy text ever.
No. No. No. No one's allowed to fuck in the yurt.
Although I'm glad you didn't let my climb in the sink, I really wish you would have let me pretend to be a duck in the shower for a little longer
If I got paid for every bad decision I've made I would be one rich bitch by now
so i woke up at six am and his bathroom was flooded. i think i fucked shit up in my sleep.
I swear to god if you settle for a trump supporting packers fan, I will not acknowledge your children. You're better than that.
I just balanced a full glass of chocolate milk on my left boob. Don't think i've ever been more proud.
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