I chose taco bell over sex...
good choice.
wait so...it's like an actual thing to masturbate using the detachable shower head? WTF I thought I was being creative!
I used to practice getting hit by cars.
Just mixed vicodin and mucinex. This cold just got fun.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just interrupted a freshman tour to ask where the sexual health center is. Figured I'd just give us all what we were really looking for.
2 more and I will have fucked 75 percent of my acting class. best. elective. ever.
He's freaking out just because my cat licked his balls while he was fucking me
I actually cannot wait for your visit. I miss people who make me look like the virgin mary in comparison.
That's not your dick yours is smaller. Nice try.
Wait why do you have a pic of someone else's dick in your phone?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
New drunken fun fact of last night, after I pushed Sarah and before I started making out with guy #1, I shouted that I'd go to third base on a first date, then threw myself at him
She introduced me as that girl Nathan was fingering
We started pregaming at 8. It's 11, and her only 11:11 wish is to be sober. It's hard to not love her.
You'll pass into the great gay beyond
Where it rains cosmopolitans and scantily clad gogo dancers of all genders direct traffic
Can't talk, ducks in the car
I need to get some goddam control over my hormones
Randomize