I swear that men would be more efficient if they had a semen gauge on their penises
Someone in my class is wearing shirt and on the back it says...National Bible Quiz Finalist 2006. Do you really expect me to find a guy here
ya i found him eventually. hes the only one who drinks guiness so I just had to follow the darkest green puke trail
i lost my airplane ticket and tried to board with a bar receipt in all the confusion. i have officially lost all brain cells in college.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I got used. This is the happiest day of my life. I was just a huge cock and that is all she needed.
Hey if there is a better reason to go drink then "I've been fucking robbed!" I have yet to hear one. Also, I've been fucking robbed.
My halloween constume SCREAMS "Hey i just got done with a shitty relationship and I'm DTF"
It was like die hard. Except with more penises.
i showed up sober to class for the first time. my prof said that i was "off my game today". i love philosophy
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just remember her dragging me inside in a panic saying we needed mentos and popcorn I have no fucking clue how we ended up asleep in her closet.
Actually, I take that back. You can only have it if I'm allowed to French braid the mullet.
Plus he stuck it in when you were sleeping which would have been the tipping point for me but you art school kids are all liberal and shit
Dude. That Grinch had his priorities right when he was worried that there might be a cash bar at that town celebration.
You know getting black out drunk at a cats birthday party should have been my lowest point drinking wise but some how I feel like last night was some how worse
For the love of all that is holy just take the tranquilizers Erica
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