and when i put it inside her she yelled "welcome aboard!"
You just left with that feminine looking guy you kept calling "Jessica." Just giving the heads up.
She had a group on her phone called "great fucks". I was in it. It's almost like making the forbes list
Drunk. I slept-stripped.
By myself.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You know me. im down for anything that could harm my well being. lets dress like dolphins so everyone will see what dicks they are.
Vodka?
Forever.
I sent him an 18 page sext. He's going to have a good morning.
We should discuss this later when sobriety has returned. Right now he's just like a distant cousin.
The drug dealer had chickens in his house so I know it was good stuff.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Trying not to look at her chest is like trying to not hear a fire engine racing by.
I really couldn't care less what she looks like. That's why The Lord Our God gave us doggy-style.
Godammit I caught my hair on fire taking a bong rip
I'm talking to a corgi on tinder..wtf has my life come to
How is it that 364 days a year I'm the adult, but on Halloween you completely forget how to have fun and become my grandma?
Found out that I went to the same elementary school as the guy I'm hooking up with. Kosher or no
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