We are walking down to the lake and then i dont know. Where did you sleep?
Places.
Plural? Please tell.
I don't smoke a lot but now and then I do. Weed and I are like still standing naked in a bathroom together deciding if we should blow one another or bolt for the exit. An awkward relationship.
She made Precious look like a solid 6.5.
I've never been so happy to start my period. I'm gonna let everyone in the store see me buying tampons.
woke up with withdrawal cold sweats this morning. spring break must really be over.
I need to stop taking drags of other peoples cigarettes, it's such a tease. Like playing just the tip, you just can't
I feel like I've been drunk all of June. And I am in NO WAY ashamed about it.
I find out next week of the Australian was lying about his vasectomy or not. Keep your fingers crossed!
Dang. We need a girls trip ASAP. Preferably in a country who has even lower standards than us on a Friday night.
I can't wait till they start promoting the testiciplasty. Turn those old prunes into fresh tight kiwis!
I could run a drunk marathon in heels
I left my ice cream out over night, it's melted, fuck this, I just poured Bailey's in it. Problems solved.
It's taking every bit of my restraint not to go to the store and buy chips and cake and like steal someone's dog. PMS is so weird.
You don't come back from leaving a bag of shit on someone's counter Jill
just drove past - why are you walking towards the shop in your pyjamas?
Can't talk, on a quest for bacon.
Randomize
