if you're gona send my txt to that site at least change my area code plz
our new exchange student wants to hear all about America's greatest politician, "Oprah." it's gonna be a long fucking day
she actually told me to ignore the cokeheads in the corner with knives.
And then she banged "the first Italian rapper"
well its a long story but basically i overcame many cockblocks
Can you explain to me the broken disco ball in my front yard?
google maps should a have a setting for this. like I AM ABANDONING EVERYTHING TO MEET A GIRL WHO IS 10 HOURS OF MILES AWAY. HOW DO WE DO THIS OPTIMALLY?
When / where did the additional couches appear?
Additional?
James brought one with him when he showed up. Theres still 2 outside and according to facebook, at least one more burned up.
You know when you get a stripper pays your bail. You got good wood.
He also complimented my butt. High praise coming from a boob guy.
I'm glad there seems to be a general consensus regarding your ass
It's not your birthday unless mom picks you up at the bar
tried to suck my ex boyfriends dick last night at a bar... Happy homecoming from me to you
Rebecca hasn't has this number in 3 months. Please tell all her friends to stop calling at 3 am. We are not interested in buying or selling drugs nor do we want to hook up with anyone. You all need to go to rehab.
my roommate woke me up with head. more awkward than it sounds.
I swear I get as excited about the sound of a condom wrapper as my cat gets when she's getting a can of food.
Randomize
