I think, one-on-one, Paul Rudd could be very threatening in like a REALLY good way.
so we were pounding it out and someone knocked on the wall and was shouting at us
that didnt stop you
nope
and all i could think about was how mcdonalds would not be open anymore after we were done having sex
Just because he's a soilder doesn't mean his dick is a hero.
thought i was the most hungover person in class until i saw a kid puke into his bookbag...he wins
being alone eating nachos and drinking from a giant munchen beermug really isnt that sad
Don't freak out about the couches in the driveway. We tried to unpack the uhaul drunk.
Is my lip ring still in your hair?
I remember all the people and all the acts I just have to match the person with the act
Oh jesus...leave it to you to hit on not one but two guys who can't fuck you till marriage.
Where were you last night, and why am I not surprised that drag queens were involved?
I'm more of a "get high and take a bath" kinda guy.
I'm pretty sure that's why we have such good sex because we are secretly trying to kill each other
Trust me. My dick only does selfies for you.
You think my vibrator will be okay in the dishwasher?
Randomize
