I just know... :) goodntight
Whoops, meant "goodnight", but the other is true too.
I just met a guy from Australia at the bar. I asked him what it was like down under and he told me if I went home with him he'd let me find out. I love Australians.
She is the perfect woman. She cooks, gives good head and doesn't care that I have a small penis.
he also begged me to fake an orgasm when he couldn't get me to come.
the girl in my class has a rolling backpack and just told it to stay. im too hungover for this.
He just ordered a bottle of Beam at an Italian place for us to share.
Going to.goingto.gtoing to DIE DIE DIEEEE......i feel like everyeone impotrant in my life like MLK is judging me.... saddd day
Nothing like buying a handle and a 36 pack with a baby strapped on.
I feel like i could break down a fucking wall with this boner
Soooo, coming over soon?
I just need like a magic vacuum to suck everything out of me and then an IV to put good stuff back in
MIDGETS
????
I threw a beer bottle at the bartender and pissed myself. Somehow, I didn't get kicked out.
Opened my notebook to coke all over the pages. So, if that's any indication on how this weekend went.
I just want to get drunk and not have to worry about you leaving me at the bar.
you were grinding on the cop whispering for him to lend you his tazer.
Randomize
