i turned job hunting into a drinking game..
i know, but like... i wanna be a CLASSY i'm-stealing-your-date kind of slutty...
My parents foreign exchange student just walked in on me whacking off. Welcome to America :)
he said i ruined lesbian porn for him
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Ok see being that I'm not present or participating your vague texts "neeeeed that" and "vagina" leave a lot to question.
My nephew just told me I smell like apathy and regret. Thats the hangover I'm dealing with
Let me begin to explain the rest of last night by beginning with saying that out if necessity I took a pair of your underwear
I'm keeping track of how many times I've said "Shhh, act like you're not naked." in my life. So far, 3 times.
Just remember, Dont make worse choices than american flag pants to your own birthday party
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There's a lady lying down on the sidewalk in front of our building smoking a cig
WAKE THE EFF UP THE UBER DRIVER IS TRYING TO TAKE ME HOME
I can't even spell what he said he was on. And I had to call 4 people before someone had heard of it.
All I want is a hot dog on a Saturday at 2:19 is that to much to ask?!
Fuck it, I'm going to make my own dick pic album since iOS 10 won't do it for me.
Dear Andy-the problem is not that I slept with your girlfriend, it's that you didn't know she's a lesbian.
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