it's not gay if you rub your penis between their butt cheeks and pretend they are tits
What happened?....
He lifted up the blanket, and whispered "Don't do it" to his sperm....
The first thing they saw when they walked in was all four of our std test's hangin on the fridge....i'd be worried if they didn't think we were sluts
you both peed in the photobooth after the pictures were taken.
Just put a dog collar on someone's child.....was a great hit with everyone but his mom.......I think she hates me. I'm okay.with that
Want to come over and rub aloe on my tits?
You should have totally come, I started watering down vodka with cider. I have lost the sense of taste.
WHY ARE THERE NO BLACK EMOJIS? I CAN NEVER PROPERLY IDENTIFY MYSELF.
well, at the moment I'm sleeping in someone's closet in a buzzlightyear snuggie, so I can't judge,
I would recommend NOT getting ass enhancement shots.
Say what you will, but only I can throw up on someone's door and make it look like art.
That's the last time I'm letting you drink that apple vodka
I threw up this morning to Silent Night playing in background. It was actually quite soothing.
I'm at the point in my life where I'm gonna sell my eggs for cash
So I just watched a seagul attack my boss and steal his food in the parking lot. Today might not be a bad day lmfao.
Get here now. There’s a guy dressed as Captain Morgan handing out miniature bottles of Captain Morgan.
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