every time i send "do you want some cock" to her T9 manages to change it to "anal"...i think she's mad now
apparently it's okay for him to stick his dick in my mouth but not to let me have a can of diet pepsi for the road.
my little brother just caught me blowing my step cousin in the lobby bathroom at our family reunion
They normally just get fucked up and see who can hold their hand on the exhaust the longest. It's great
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i just rememebered i spent like 5 minutes on the ground warming some chicks toes.
It's a 2 hour train ride a 7 in the morning, of course we're bringing alcohol
So ahh..."Multicultural Night" turned into "Fuck the Neighbor Night"
The cop let me finish my J before he cuffed me. Coolest arresting officer ever.
We're following a guy carrying a door for beer pong at his place..join us when you are deemed sober enough to leave the hospital.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Great. Now I have to produce, edit and leak a sex tape before Saturday. Fundraising is hard.
ATTENTION PENIS' OF BURLINGTON: I AM COMING FOR YOU
You're a hot mess, you know that?
At least I'm a FUN hot mess. Like a train crash full of pizza, fireworks and glitter.
In this house, we have but one simple rule: DONT FUCKIN TOUCH MY STUFF OR I'LL CUT YOUR NECK IN UR SLEEP
Sorry I missed your birthday party. I caught a dick and rode it to O-Town
He expects a blow job at the movies but won’t pay for popcorn? Does he know it’s not 2017 anymore
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