i have a strong urge to join the asians in the park doing tai chi. I think im still high .
So i decided to deal with the awkwardness of last night by making out with all three of them
the toilet has never flushed louder then when you sneak home drunk and try to avoid your parents hearing you puke.
swear to god some girl just crawled out of the washing machine. this is intense.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You would think that someone would have been sober enough to object to vodka bong races.
Does the whole "it was New Years" excuse apply this year?
You guys can't keep having sex with them and cleaning their house! They're never going to take you seriously!
My roommate took my designated hickey removing spoon out of the freezer.
first reaction to dying the pubes purple - awesome. Reaction after I explain the process - not awesome. Hypothesis? when girls find out you know to bleach and dye your hair, they're turned off.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Bro she gave me the stare. It's like she boned me with her eyes. I'm going in.
Blasting venetian snares and drinking a beer. I love being an adult. It's like being a child but with beer for breakfast, better music, and no one yells at you.
It's like a booty call, except its for tacos...and you're my brother.
Not now. Out of camp chairs. Carving a new one with a chainsaw. Mushrooms are starting to kick and I gotta get this done NOW.
His birthday is on Valentines Day, of course he's getting a blowjob
Thank god for Taco Bell keeping you out of jail
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