finally nailed that neighbor chick. hopefully i can get her wireless password now. free internet trumps moral standards any day
All semester I have been trying to figure out if this kid in front of me is gay. His cell phone just went off with Britney's "Circus". Case closed.
they named it eva bongoria. i had to hit it based on the name alone.
I think you can do her, she seemed pretty set for revenge the second time her boyfrind high fives her in the face.
I lost it last night. That was humiliating. Cincinnati is now covered in my puke.
tell your freshman friends. will trade sexual favors for swipes. ive got dinner tomorrow open and lunch on wed
20 bottles of wine, 3 cases or beer, and 5 bottles in my kitchen... My parents are teasing me.
Speaking of gay, some dude in a life vest just goes, we should pull our dicks out! To larry. Were leaving now. I saw penis
Jesus christ it's been two texts and we are already talking about dildos
The fact that he said "there's nothing wrong with being a raging drunk, just ask my mother." has me thinking that I have no positive role-models among my friends.
This 35 year old just told me that he was headed to the dance floor and it was about to get real dangerous......was that an invite?
You told your mom that it was your second day sober. I think she believed it until you jumped off the balcony
You're never gonna guess who's blood is on my shirt
Why do I feel like I really don't want to hear the end of this...
I just got his Save the Dave and, to answer your next question, NO I AM NOT GOING TO THE WEDDING OF THE GUY WHO GOT DRUNK AND CAME ON MY CHEST.
Well, I currently have zero fuckboys and my vibrator just broke. A fresh start to May.
Randomize
