thank you TLC waking up to a water birth on tv really put the cherry on top of my hangover...
drunk. just smoked a spliff with a 19yr old hungarian bike taxi driver and bonded over the difficulties of getting weed in a different country. idk y shit like this isnt in the study abroad info packets
I just found the gloves and lightbulb I stole. Did you pee on a ATM inside a bank?
They play video games, go on acid trips, and in times of need, are willing to donate plasma together. COUPLE OF THE YEAR.
I NEED to see if his girl has a sister.
COME GET ME FR THE HOSPIGAL'!!!!!
I am honored my friend, to hold the decision of what enters your body
I'm concerned that this blind man on the bus has a boner right now
Dick sucking on arrival? or would you like to cash that in later?
The only person I have to bring is crazy hospital guy
HE'S NOT INVITED!!!
I'm just saying, I walked in on you blowing a burrito. I now understand how obsessed you are with Taco Bell. And how long it's been since you've got some.
Sorry I called bc I needed help peeing outside
But I did it
I should not be able to sum up my life with a taco brand motto...
Why am I sleeping on top of the fridge?
You were playing hide and seek with the dog. she couldn't find you and you passed out.
I think I just shit out all my problems.
I peed in Andys sink the other day bc I didnt want him to hear me pee
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