Puking blue powerade in mcdonalds parking lot to the applause of the guy taking out the trash with man in the mirror blasting in the background. Good morning stl
you made pancakes with beer, you said they were good. then you threw up 15 minutes later
season finale of lost and an oz of weed. tonight my mind is going to be blown.
you could never motorboat her...you'd have to motor-titanic her
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
coming from the girl bound and determined to pee in the snow
why would you restrict a girl of that
They left me passes out in the food donation bin with an empty handle and a half eaten box of nutter butters
Drunk. But sober enough to know I hate gymnastics.
She was giving me head while we were in my tree house, my mom then came out to let the dog out so she stopped so I would stop groaning, was it good? You tell me
Proudest moment of my life. Just watched a guy walk into the side of a car because I winked at him. Love these yoga pants and my hair. Fuck yes. His mouth was hanging open.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Apparently I filled my purse with chicken nuggets and told my mom I was a "sexual squirrel."
Ooo, yeah! Thanksgiving will be a blast. Can't fuckin wait for the next round of "have you found a nice young man yet?" Followed by a lovely helping of "don't worry, there's someone out there for you."
Plus i lost a button on my shirt and we got free drinks all night. Sorry I'm not sorry.
He was walking around and kept offering the neighbors flamingo lawn ornaments shots of vodka.
Hurry I'm alone dressed like a prostitute eating French fries.
"You can have sex in my class, just stay quiet. I don't like noise." My professor... Shall make for an interesting semester.
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