i jus got home and totaly forgot i had nut all over the back of my shirt
..im mad u rememberd about that
Just watched a guy pause a bluetooth convo to puke outside of esso. gotta love orangeville
woke up with withdrawal cold sweats this morning. spring break must really be over.
Why did I think it was so necessary to steal that rolling pin?
I don't know what you're talking about. I just drank beer out of my own bellybutton by doing a backbend and letting it run down my body.
You dont lie about slip and slides
Hey guy that stepped on my foot, don't slap my ass to apologize.
No, they seem attractive after SIX beers, after three they're just the gender you're looking for.
You decided that walking wasn't in the cards for you anymore
I had a drink called "the white nun." It tasted like Marshmallows, and celibacy.
Who gives a hand job to a 19 yr old one night then the next lets a 31 year old random man fly a plane to town and pick u up and take u to dinner?
That's like doing a cinnamon challenge in my vag - but more painful.
You must have my penis confused with someone else's...which is disappointing
I stole an accordion from the bar
Accidentally
I'm having ragrets about stealing the accordion
Ahhh, beer. My second favorite breakfast drink.
Randomize
