Let's hustle tonight so we can relax tomorrow
Perfect. Like where your heads at
By relax I mean have sex
Greg found me on xtube. Who knew random hook ups would leave their web cams on and upload it. At least it shows off big penis.
So the last day on the vacation I woke up in the bath tub. My mom said she asked me during the night what I was doing and I said, "swimming."
On my way, I hope you have alcohol for me to blame stuff on...
his receeding hairline makes running into him so much less awkward. almost enjoyable actualy
I think she's a little more wasted than usual. She just crawled on the floor to tell mom it was time to take a shot.
Congrats. You are not detrimental enough to my psyche to be discussed during this mornings therapy appointment. Please follow up next week to see if you made the cut.
Just watched my roommate stuff a sandwich in his pocket because we're out of paper plates.
He's going to be my graduation present to myself.
I literally got so drunk last night, I texted myself "porpoises" and that was it. I have no recollection of this.
I've already dropped her on the ground of a crowded bar dancing , been incoherent drunk to the point i couldn't speak and came within 2 seconds all on separate evenings so at this point she should know what I'm about
my goal for the rest of college is to escape STD free. fuck getting a job. this is more important.
He yelled "Go Ducks" while he came
We both fell asleep mid-handjob and he continued to call it "handjob halftime".
Tomorrow has nothing to do with the threesome
I am the one with the vagina. I get to call it.
Randomize
