My hot female boss's cubical is right next to mine with a wall between us. Do you think it is too forward to make a glory hole in the wall?
She just sent me a picture of a heart. I need to stop fucking freshman...
His dick was so small it sat perched on top of his balls like it was king of his scrotum.
you fucking puked into the top of the beer bong while i was chugging from it. when i realized i was chugging your vomit, i vomitted on the floor. she kicked us both out.
The hot Japanese girl in my class just said her "favorite sexy American actor is Nick Cage." That, I can work with.
is it too early in the day to continue our conversation about penis shapes?
You're probably reading this when you wake up from your "nap" in the front yard. Maybe next week you should go to class, and not start Thirsty Thursday at 9:30 in the morning.
It was my little brother's 14th birthday today. Didn't know what to get him so I just showed him how to use incognito tabs on google chrome.
I put tequila in my salad dressing yesterday. Step the fuck up.
I'm having post-experience "why didn't I fuck her in a public bathroom" regrets
It wasn't a great time! You grabbed me, picked me up, and make me pee in the sink!
After sex he brought chocolates and said he loves RuPaul's Drag Race. How many points does he score for that?
I'm bathroom at buffalo wild wings
I think incapable of making pants work send help
How am i even supposed to meet his daughter? "Hi, Claire, I hear we have so much in common, like we both love your Dad and also we're almost the same age."
I took out a life ins. policy Thursday. It's okay I can die in Nashville now.
Randomize
