he mailed me a thank you note for the blowjob.
Just took a celebratory "i havent slept with anyone in this bar" shot. yesssss....
So, I just sold my textbook to have money for Plan B.
You can't see him, he's in front of the dildo, but Amelia Earhart is blocking your view.
Don't worry we found her. Somehow she ended up on my roof with 2 bar stools
On my way home I stopped at target and bought beer and galoshes. I am a planner.
Ok fine. Wild. Free. Like a stallion set free in a beautiful meadow filled with flowers and sexy lady horses
I was in the freezer we were knocking over shit. Speaking of which i asked my boss. I can hook up with girls in the freezer
Yeah just sayin. Whenever you want to come over and wank me off you can
Good news, I found your other leg warmer. Bad news, I don't know if the pile of puke I found it in was yours.
Well after the shots I danced with a homeless guy, split my toe on broken glass, and had a 20 piece mcnugget. Who says postgrad life is boring.
you showed up at my door at 3am, handed me a bag of cold chicken nuggets and said "lead me to the non-irish Siobhans," do YOU think you were tripping?
I feel like if he almost got me pregnant once, i can at least say hi in a bar
I just farted so loud someone came to check on me. Thought something fell in my office.
He wants another date...I mean he's cute, but I just am not ready to give up my glamorous single-girl lifestyle here.
you mean the one where you drink out of the carton and don't wear pants?
Yeah, and pee with the door open. It's the little things.
Then you guys just all showered together...?
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