We even fucked WHILE he was making me breakfast in bed.
I don't know how I got that girl last night. I feel like seal right now sans the scars
i just recognized the girl sitting across from me from a lesbian porno... should i ask for an autograph?
I JUST WANT TO WATCH PORN BUT THE CAT IS JUST SITTING HERE LICKING HIS BALLS. I CAN'T DO IT.
I had a great penis washing session in the sink before I left. Washed off all the bar and green beer
well apperantly i passed out on the stairs shouting "victory".
The bartender just hugged us goodnight. I think we go there too often.
We hooked up. It felt slightly wrong considering he is my foreign exchange student but there's a reason America imports. Foreigners got the goods.
She keeps asking if I've seen him... For the last time YES... IN MY BED LAST FRIDAY NIGHT AND THEN AGAIN SATURDAY MORNING
I don't think he cares about your inhospitable uterus.
you know it was a successful halloween when you wake up and have a firecracker in your tits
For a second I thought I had fallen asleep on the floor and freaked out. Then I thought somehow I was on drugs. This is my life.
Well he had a nice beard and it smelled good so there was no way I wasn’t going home with him.
Apparently I showed all your grooms men my vagina to prove I did not have underwear on. Awesome
She played the piano. I played the piano. She got on top of the piano. I got on top of her.
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