Dude. Muppets take manhattan on netflix instant. Pass my midterm or relive my childhood? Tough decision.
i wanna have a kid now so by the time he's 20 ill only be 42 and assuming im already divorced we can pick up girls together
I don't know at least half of his name. I have officially become a statistic.
I woke up to a gnawing sound in the middle of the night and asked him what it was. He told me it was the family of squirrels that lives in the wall and to go back to sleep.
That's all? I'm a pro at gay chicken. I'll touch his dick, I have no problem with that.
Yes and yes. Got taken to a Florida strip club. I desperately want to flood my eyes and ears with hand sanitizer right now.
At what point in life does one make the conscious decision to incorporate capes into everyday life? Like, as a fashion statement?
I'm not sure how to answer that. Is it a general question or one you're wondering about for yourself? Because I don't think you're there yet.
I drank toilet water last night, I can't answer you because my phone is in rice.
She just texted me apologizing for taking selfies on my phone then asked me to send them to her
Trying to do the walk of shame over here WHY are there a hundred ppl on the el?! Thank god I pulled a summit and wore casual clothes I even stopped by the farmers market and bought some squash
All i really remember is meeting this guy dressed as jesus and i kept taking his wine and saying "the body of christ!"
I also woke up in my friends room to 3 girls and a naked boy on the floor but thats besides the point
I think you are severely overestimating being able to get your lingerie back by posting the lyrics of Irreplaceable
You put THAT much Jager in me and expect me to realize when things are a bad idea?
At least he's enough of a gentleman to not make me do the walk of shame dressed as Santa.
My vagina knows your penis is sad about Andrew Luck. You should come over and let her comfort him in his time of need
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