I just blew up the bathroom at work and now I feel like a new woman
We're doing the donut challenge later. How many can we fit on his erect penis. Needless to say we get along well.
Kill yourself wednesday started off with a bang, and im pretty sure im still drunk from tequila tuesday.
How did a couple beers and monopoly turn into a bottle of vodka and throwing eggs at eachother in the kitchen?
I think I should advise against you hooking up with a guy that throws "the shocker" up in all of his pictures on facebook. Just sayin.
Apparently I got mad at you for "Not drinking with me till we thought we were seahorses" and smashed my face on your door. Then I put my feet in the oven and started crying because I was drinking alcohol from a pot. My life is spinning out of control.
So I've been thinking about this, and I've decided my bed is magic. Every time I change the sheets, a new boy is in my bed. I own the Sheets of Dreams-if I change them, they will come.
Question: trumpet bong. Can it work.
I puked up my nose. THAT kind of night
i sent my dealer a picture of the money i would pay him. i also told him i would pay him in cheez-its if he would prefer that.
I'm pretty sure my therapist gave me the green light to fuck him.
My mom is dancing slutty on the bar I need more drinks to be ok with this
Just found out my dad smokes weed too. Mom, grandma, all aunts and uncles, and now my dad too. It's like I'm genetically engineered to be a stoner.
he said he only had one rule...that he'd only go down on me 3x a day. so far this is turning into the best relationship ever.
I sort of feel bad for this orthodontist. The things that have been in my mouth in the past 12 hours aren't exactly socially acceptable.
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