He's been sleeping iwht ***
Nooo
Yeah I don't even know how, she looks like her mom smoked crack while she was in the womb
And then hit her in the face with a shovel
We stole some shitttt from king sooper's. fuck yeaaa
what did you steal
frozen pizza, cat litter, and preperation H. not much different than my usual grocery list.
Am I allowed to make my facebook status "loves farting in chairs"? I think it would shock every boy that I am friends with.
Ive had to apologize to every girl i know today because of you
just ate frosted cheerios in coffee with some marshmellows. the college diet begins
I think he liked me better when I only opened my mouth to suck his dick.
he said he wants to do me james and the giant peach style. im afraid of what that means. but moderately excited. wish me luck.
Would it be a dick move to report the suite next-door for a noise violation? They're singing Bad Romance off-key and I'm not sure if I can allow that.
nothing like a tattoo of a large eagle attacking a small eagle whos attacking a shark to bond to siblings together for life
Next guy we share better have a little more dignity than that
I have bruises on the inside of my thighs from sliding down the stair case...thanks for encouraging that slut show
Had sex with him again...yikes. and the whole time he kept saying "i wish we could do this forever." Forever lasted about 45 seconds
Im calling you paparazzi cause of all the dick pics you take of your one night stands ps loved the panoramic one!
Pretty sure i brought my phone charger to a booty call
Pro: 2020 made it easier to hook up with strippers
Con: explaining to Kari why there’s always strippers at our house
Pro: there’s always strippers at our house
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