Texts From Last Night

• Favorite

  (205): View more from Alabama

  How long until YT realizes that it's a man?

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (205): How long until YT realizes that it's a man? http://tfl.nu/84xs
  Replies (1) Good night (660) Bad night (893)
• Favorite

  (978): View more from Massachusetts

  jungle juice + heels + stairs = broken arm

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (978): jungle juice + heels + stairs = broken arm http://tfl.nu/w84r
  Replies (13) Good night (988) Bad night (5404)
• Favorite

  (973): View more from New Jersey

  so it turns out that "condoms galore" does, indeed, come up on your bank statement

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (973): so it turns out that "condoms galore" does, indeed, come up on your bank statement http://tfl.nu/oky4
  Replies (12) Good night (4856) Bad night (1530)
• Favorite

  (612): View more from Minnesota

  So it turns out rose was the bear hunting girl. Fuck my life

  (1-612): View more from Minnesota

  None of those words made sense together.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (612): So it turns out rose was the bear hunting girl. Fuck my life (1-612): None of those words made sense together. http://tfl.nu/fi74
  Replies (6) Good night (1938) Bad night (655)
• Favorite

  (605): View more from South Dakota

  Just used the leftover candycorn for candycorn vodka. Our house is trying to continue the Halloween spirit for as long as possible.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (605): Just used the leftover candycorn for candycorn vodka. Our house is trying to continue the Halloween spirit for as long as possible. http://tfl.nu/ozx2
  Replies (3) Good night (1678) Bad night (625)
• Favorite

  (301): View more from Maryland

  Just got blown in a rental car. I need to get rear ended more often

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (301): Just got blown in a rental car. I need to get rear ended more often http://tfl.nu/2a6o
  Replies (8) Good night (1771) Bad night (578)
• Favorite

  (717): View more from Pennsylvania

  They're re-releasing Titanic in 3-D. Can I interest you in a joint venture to create the greatest drinking game of all time? I think yes

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (717): They're re-releasing Titanic in 3-D. Can I interest you in a joint venture to create the greatest drinking game of all time? I think yes http://tfl.nu/nt6q
  Replies (4) Good night (1623) Bad night (613)
• Favorite

  (304): View more from West Virginia

  You know what my problem is? I'm like a machine designed for the sole intention of removing the pants from damaged girls.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (304): You know what my problem is? I'm like a machine designed for the sole intention of removing the pants from damaged girls. http://tfl.nu/z9o6
  Replies (34) Good night (2092) Bad night (769)
• Favorite

  (330): View more from Ohio

  Did i mention i'm like the equivilent of a prepubescent boy suffering from preejaculacy? I just about creamed my pants when he grabbed my hand..

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (330): Did i mention i'm like the equivilent of a prepubescent boy suffering from preejaculacy? I just about creamed my pants when he grabbed my hand.. http://tfl.nu/4ww2
  Replies (11) Good night (1579) Bad night (583)
• Favorite

  (209): View more from California

  I think I want to impress his gay best friend more than him..

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (209): I think I want to impress his gay best friend more than him.. http://tfl.nu/g4nz
  Replies (3) Good night (1104) Bad night (583)
• Favorite

  (479): View more from Arkansas

  I just can't even fathom the crazy and I work at a mental hospital.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (479): I just can't even fathom the crazy and I work at a mental hospital. http://tfl.nu/6mwi
  Replies (1) Good night (724) Bad night (309)
• Favorite

  (614): View more from Ohio

  I am slightly proud of the fact his mom turns on the dryer located behind the spare bedroom EVERY time we visit!

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (614): I am slightly proud of the fact his mom turns on the dryer located behind the spare bedroom EVERY time we visit! http://tfl.nu/68by
  Replies (3) Good night (730) Bad night (489)
• Favorite

  (310): View more from California

  So to add to headbutting the microwave while waiting for my hot pockets to cook. I apparently told both bartenders earlier in the night I was going to fuck them both. I hate black out drunk me..

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (310): So to add to headbutting the microwave while waiting for my hot pockets to cook. I apparently told both bartenders earlier in the night I was going to fuck them both. I hate black out drunk me.. http://tfl.nu/vhak
  Replies (2) Good night (579) Bad night (363)
• Favorite

  (586): View more from Michigan

  Just accidentally flashed my junk to the lady helping me try on suits, it was cold in there, I don't think she was impressed.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (586): Just accidentally flashed my junk to the lady helping me try on suits, it was cold in there, I don't think she was impressed. http://tfl.nu/40ub
  Replies (3) Good night (355) Bad night (690)
• Favorite

  (703): View more from Virginia

  You held an empty wine bottle to your head and declared yourself the "wine unicorn." For the rest of the night you galloped everywhere and whenever anyone refused to be a wine unicorn with you, you tried to spear them with the bottle.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (703): You held an empty wine bottle to your head and declared yourself the "wine unicorn." For the rest of the night you galloped everywhere and whenever anyone refused to be a wine unicorn with you, you tried to spear them with the bottle. http://tfl.nu/esvn
  Replies (0) Good night (805) Bad night (394)

Randomize