Seriously. He was just sitting there naked in the dark with a boner pissed that I came home late.
How did the whale quest end up? I saw u hit a little snag when the first one heard you call her that.
we already have meals planned for the weekend.
SEMEN IS NOT A MEAL.
Do you think I could put your penis on reserve for tonight or tomorrow night?
You sir are most definitely in. Better get your penis an umbrella as that bad boy is gonna get soakkkkkkeddddd.
And I was aware of my actions - that is not a penis I will say no to until I have a ring on my finger
Just made a list of all the guys I've hooked up with. "Roofie tattoo eyelids", "xanex night guy", "rainy concert", "cory blanket" and "naked hottub guy" made it.
I really want to fuck that guy in the full wind breaker suit
She told me she's into girls now. I told her there would be a full bottle of jäger and an empty bed here Friday.
He said "just hugs" and ran away screaming.
So it may have been laced, sue me.
Watching a bear prancing around in a tiara is worth a loss of bar time.
Remember when you tried to talk but you could only count by 2s?
Yeah, great now I will be tampon girl
Act your age.
I am. I'm acting like a drunk 20 year old.
I know! It's like he knows when my vagina wants to misbehave!
Randomize
