come over anyways, right now, right this second
it can be a super quick quicky, then you can go back to studying
wow, that sounds SO fun, please stop enticing me with premature ejaculation
I tried to tell him it was only 2:00, but he said since it was 5:00 in New York, it was perfectly acceptable. He then put on a Blues Brothers hat and a pair of wayfarers and left. I expect him home in a few hours with a police escort.
sorry i walked in and ruined it, but i had to laugh she looked like a pile of bologna the way you had her pinned up on the wall
She calls her new ritual "bed, bath, and beyond crunk". Hence why I found her passed out in my bath tub this morning.
Just tried my new showerhead. Sex with Brian will never be the same.
He bought me flowers. The card with it said: Sorry I cant get you off. I will try harder.
High enough to fry lime slices.....tasted like shit, by the way
Just think. Tomorrow you'll wake up, shower, and get your brains fucked out. That's your ice cream. Today is your peas and carrots.
I barely even remember him. He is just a distant beard in my past.
Halfway through lecture, some kid in the front row threw up IN his hands. Professor held the door for him to carry it out.
Just consider it? What else do you have going on today that could be as awesome as a day full of lord of the rings and sex?
Just busted the chick who slept with my boyfriend with alcohol. God I love being an RA.
I was just thinking about if my bath water turned to jello and got a little freaked out
So I got offered a job this morning based on being a "good role model for girls" and I am drunk at 330 in the afternoon in "celebration." sometimes, life is insane. But not so bad.
I wasn't talking about him I meant his penis! Its not a pet
Oh. Well it should be. I like petting it.
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