Texts From Last Night

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  (415): View more from California

  Remember ______, girl, blonde, one of my roommates the first year of ________?

  (323): View more from California

  Yeah we hooked up in the top bunk bed while simultaneously having a conversation with u, so yeah, I remember her

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  (415): Remember ______, girl, blonde, one of my roommates the first year of ________? (323): Yeah we hooked up in the top bunk bed while simultaneously having a conversation with u, so yeah, I remember her http://tfl.nu/qxlw
  Replies (3) Good night (1237) Bad night (453)
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  (206): View more from Washington

  My body isn't even mad at me...just disappointed

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  (206): My body isn't even mad at me...just disappointed http://tfl.nu/sgs1
  Replies (19) Good night (3715) Bad night (1215)
• Favorite

  (732): View more from New Jersey

  Between the two of us weve fucked every guy at this table

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  (732): Between the two of us weve fucked every guy at this table http://tfl.nu/oexb
  Replies (40) Good night (7053) Bad night (1863)
• Favorite

  (510): View more from California

  I don't know what you drank last night but you really enjoyed the 4 egg body shots.

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  (510): I don't know what you drank last night but you really enjoyed the 4 egg body shots. http://tfl.nu/tjxa
  Replies (1) Good night (842) Bad night (2721)
• Favorite

  (703): View more from Virginia

  She refered to her bed as the "cockpit"....I understand that this morning.

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  (703): She refered to her bed as the "cockpit"....I understand that this morning. http://tfl.nu/a0no
  Replies (8) Good night (3620) Bad night (909)
• Favorite

  (608): View more from Wisconsin

  He said "ride me pocahontas" while I was on top of him last night

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  (608): He said "ride me pocahontas" while I was on top of him last night http://tfl.nu/for8
  Replies (9) Good night (4809) Bad night (1608)
• Favorite

  (504): View more from Louisiana

  Managed to discreetly puke out of a moving streetcar window, in front of no less than a dozen people. Nobody saw/said anything. I feel like a legit local now.

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  (504): Managed to discreetly puke out of a moving streetcar window, in front of no less than a dozen people. Nobody saw/said anything. I feel like a legit local now. http://tfl.nu/h0mp
  Replies (9) Good night (2881) Bad night (846)
• Favorite

  (651): View more from Minnesota

  I cant tell which is worse. That its only my third time doing laundry this year or that its the first time ive done it sober.

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  (651): I cant tell which is worse. That its only my third time doing laundry this year or that its the first time ive done it sober. http://tfl.nu/gztw
  Replies (5) Good night (1431) Bad night (790)
• Favorite

  (832): View more from Houston, Texas

  I need a straight guy to pretend to be my boyfriend for 30 minutes so that I can pull off an act of petty vengeance. Interested?

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  (832): I need a straight guy to pretend to be my boyfriend for 30 minutes so that I can pull off an act of petty vengeance. Interested? http://tfl.nu/a21v
  Replies (7) Good night (2039) Bad night (509)
• Favorite

  (410): View more from Maryland

  That birthday blow job you ordered came in the mail today. I suggest you hurry home.

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  (410): That birthday blow job you ordered came in the mail today. I suggest you hurry home. http://tfl.nu/bawg
  Replies (9) Good night (2535) Bad night (462)
• Favorite

  (704): View more from North Carolina

  I think that's why god made me a woman. Bc it's harder to slap people in the face with a vagina.

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  (704): I think that's why god made me a woman. Bc it's harder to slap people in the face with a vagina. http://tfl.nu/8h1n
  Replies (9) Good night (614) Bad night (296)
• Favorite

  (760): View more from California

  Competitive oral. I'm always telling girls they are only the fourth, maybe third, best blowjob I've had. They go back down with something to prove.

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  (760): Competitive oral. I'm always telling girls they are only the fourth, maybe third, best blowjob I've had. They go back down with something to prove. http://tfl.nu/hs8c
  Replies (8) Good night (1614) Bad night (412)
• Favorite

  (781): View more from Massachusetts

  What's the procedure for answering a booty call from someone under house arrest?

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  (781): What's the procedure for answering a booty call from someone under house arrest? http://tfl.nu/6m0u
  Replies (4) Good night (291) Bad night (412)
• Favorite

  (239): View more from Florida

  Best line overheard at the bar: "This is the last time I'm shaving my ass for him...I mean we just broke up".

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  (239): Best line overheard at the bar: "This is the last time I'm shaving my ass for him...I mean we just broke up". http://tfl.nu/fu9d
  Replies (2) Good night (315) Bad night (498)
• Favorite

  (727): View more from Florida

  Ever wonder what all the drugs you've ever done would look like put together?

  (813): View more from Florida

  Heaven. . It would look like heaven

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  (727): Ever wonder what all the drugs you've ever done would look like put together? (813): Heaven. . It would look like heaven http://tfl.nu/645f
  Replies (4) Good night (626) Bad night (259)

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