they ran out of cups so I just drank out of a cowbell.
before tonight, i was terrified of what tequila would make me do. but all it did was make me hook up with a movie star. sooo basically tequila's my new fave
We'll cross that bridge when we come to it... Or burn it. Either way we'll deal with it later
I'm concerned you might be passed out on a random rooftop right now. Not concerned enough to do anything about it. Hope you're alive. Goodnight.
We did naked snow angels in 14 degree weather, you can't tell me you had more liquor at that party
Hahaha I asked him about her bjs and he said "I would not wish that on anyone"
i miss our vodka / percocet laundry days.
hey, you wanna get together over coffee or something?
is this code for 'i just got broke up with and i need a sympathy dicking'?
how did you know?
Just saw a tranny in a skimpy captain america costume walking around campus. Going to follow her. You gotta see this
Yelling back at the people on Jerry springer through the TV, and eventually punching it. Failure of a night.
Doc gave me something stronger than Xanax. The pills have your last name imprinted on them. This cannot be coincidence.
You climbed out your own window and walked in the front door..
His name is Dustib. Not a typo. I just can't.
Also I've come to learn that "type" and "fetish" are different things. Apologies for earlier confusion.
This town reeks of teen pregnancy.
Randomize
