the night i cant remember will be the night i always remember thanks to my "i
You look at her and you just know the only action she's gotten is from her tampon..
So drunk can't even tell it's my own house. WOaoOw.
If there's ever a time when I've matured to the point that I don't want to look at camera-phone-titties, go ahead and bury me in a shallow grave by the railroad tracks.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just threw up during my phone interview for the largest PR firm in the world.
No no no no no. Not interrested. She looks just like Kim's fat booth picture. Only real.
I've never seen the starbucks guy more terrified than when you dove out the car window after your credit card
Its like the unofficial aniversary of the loss of her virginity. And I will be giving tours of the spot they did it in and showing how I'm serious when I say the grass doesn't grow there anymore.
HE TALKS ABOUT HIS DICK IN THIRD PERSON ABORT MISSION ABORT FUCKING MISSION
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm currently sitting beside my brother who is taking a bath and feeding him nachos while he covers his genitals. If that's not sibling bonding then I don't know what is
Hey can you tell Daniel there's a bottle of Captain Morgan's in the dryer ...
Sorry I think you have the wrong number
Yes it looks like I do
I don't care how hot she was. She didn't like Scooby Doo and I don't fuck with that.
Do you think it would be okay if i cleaned my cartilage piercing with the leftover vodka?
Well, I like big penises but it's not like he walks around with it out or anything so yes I think he has beautiful eyes
He’s perfect! He listens to Genesis during sex and has a VW bus!
You really are from the panhandle, aren’t you?
Randomize