Kroger has a sale on economy packs of some ridic brand of condom with a smiley devil heart on it $4.99 for 24
Sounds like a baby waitign to happen
He can't get past my hymen. At least that's what he said it feels like.
Peanut butter while high is kinda stressful
I am drunk at a castle and it isn't even 3. Europe is amazing.
she both took care of me and took advantage of me. it was BEAUTIFUL.
Yea my vagina was pretty pissed at me for not taking advantage of the situation...
i will trade you pizza and a blowjob for a fifth of vodka.
do i get to eat the pizza while you give me the blowjob?
Legitimate logistical question....how did you pee in your duct tape dress?
Almost just bought a peacock. I need to get off Craigslist
This family outing has commenced with me throwing up in an apple orchard
Just fell off my bed trying to pose and take a nude for you. Probably broke my wrist
How many nights in 2015 can we have no one get injured, run away crying, or get into a brawl?
You know its an epic night when omar the garbage man gives you a ride home at 6 in the morning.
I think I am just gonna marry that lesbian. She is more of a respectful gentleman than any of the guys I've slept with.
I don't want a big night. But I am okay if we wake up in a penthouse at Crown Casino.
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