I'm watching harry potter...good thing I already know I'm gay
idk, it's all black and i hear low talking...
dude, i think you're in initiation!
shit. that's not good.
Braces and a neon one piece. She looks 15.
i'm in love
you dont have to exercise, you threw up last night!
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you left with a lisa lampanelli lookalike... i hope she was atleast funny
he's totally gay but hes wondering what hes missing out on. Im going to show him.
Post-sex chicken soup was such a good idea. It's been like an hour and I'm still applauding myself
I'm going out w/ her for her b-day in a bit. I just talked to one of her drunk friends on the phone who asked if I could "handle 7 lesbian." This could be interesting.
I feel like delivery guys should know that when you order lunch for one and answer the door wearing sweatpants, there's no need to say "Happy Valentine's Day."
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Right but I don't wanna waste the whole weekend not having sex when we could be having sex
So... crashing at the hot bartender's place is not a solid marital decision.
My whole house smells like Spaghetti-Os and cat litter. I think I've failed as an adult.
Do you think I can get away with quoting Work Bitch by Britney Spears in my speech?
its weird getting into a political debate with a pony dressed as an anime character online