I wanna go to beed woth a nboy
I'm still not a hundred percent.. I haven't shit anything solid in two days.. I have pulled my puker muscles and I can't take deep breaths cuz of other unidentified muscles/maybe heart attack
I wanna throw up and cum in that order
Yes I slept with him, he was the only one not wearing a costume. Guys with costumes are just trying to impress you.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Me and a 30 year old man are sitting in my bathtub in swimsuits drinking straight rum from the bottle. Don't tell me how fucked up your Christmas is.
I had a sex dream. With two guys. And my subconscious decided to put your dick on BOTH OF THEM. If there is a society where that does not mean "I cherish you" I do not want to live there.
I just walked away from a youth soccer tournament popping every birth control pill I had left in the pack.
Turns out she left way earlier. So I'm stuck with this guy asking where he can score meth and if I'm really straight.
If you don't fuck me hard, rough, and senseless the minute we're alone in your room, I'm returning you to the boyfriend store
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
How long have I been using my debit card as a coaster?
I climaxed at the same time the bass dropped. I think it's safe to say I've reached enlightenment
I love when my neighbors have passionate, loud sex to remind me that I'm not getting laid
Well supposedly when the cops came, they say I tried to get them in a conga line like Jim Carrey in The Mask. So....yea
This is why I love being gay. I could never afford that much birth control.
Found your brother. He was passed out in the tub holding a bottle of Shatto milk wearing nothing but his tighty-whities.
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