Is it bad that my booty call's snoring was more interesting than the sex we had last night?
now i know why they say having sex with her is the equivalent to licking a pay phone
he changed my name in his contacts to "rick", so his mom wouldn't know he was texting me
the threesome consisted of him fingering dana while i laid next to them watching how i met your mother.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Sunshine is the equivalent of sprinkling whore pellets on campus.
Should i put up a tasteful banner for your party that says last chance to sleep with maya?
I bought a sword. Make the proper arrangements.
omg just made cake vodka jello shots, sooooo excited
dear god these taste like death. death and sprinkles
Hope you don't mind if I never tell my family about you.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Add caroling to the list of things we need to do in an elevator
Everytime Our professor said "penis fencing" in class today we took shots.
I don't know if I'm feeling really nervous right now or just extremely horny.
And I wasn't prepared because its been a very long and lonely season and I wasn't expecting to find dick at Press Box trivia night....
I came in like 30 seconds, and my dog got to watch me take the walk of shame to the bathroom to clean up. All in all, not my best performance.
Compositionally, that's actually a really nice picture.
And your penis looks really nice too.
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