:( I'm sorry!!!
sexual favors sorry?
absolutely not
you know you're not getting laid when you start breaking awkward silences with quotes from Robot Chicken
He came all over my face... then said "YOU HAVE BEEN ROBBED!"
What's this douchebags name?
Rob...
and then they started calling me 'Shitshow Shandra', which apparently i took as a compliment.
Turned out not to be so bad. He had a big dick and i owed him for all the free beer over the year.
i love that youre following in my footsteps.. pissing yourself on your birthday is an honor and a privlege
ill give you the fast version. Hooked up with 17 year old coworker while housestting for my boss
seriously considering responding to a craigslist ad for a lesbian cunninlingus instructor...at this point i'm so desperate for a job that i'm willing to switch teams.
Seriously, dude... You knows its bad when you gag on her nipple.
Exactly. So you're exempt under the "I can't just fuck her to make it go away" clause of 2010.
Well I've made a drinking game out of the Wiggles but I think I've got this babysitting thing down
I told her to to let go of her rationtal thoughts and just enjoy the fact that i was going down on her till she passed out from sheer orgasmic pleasure.
Her ex was at the party her housemates were having. He knocked on her door asking how she was while we were going at it. Turns out they were trying to work things out. Don't think I'll ever forget his face when we walked out of her room.
Currently googling hangover cures, which looks a lot like working from the perspective of my boss.
just call my name and ill be there, if we are puking, beating up bitches, or pickin up men, OR avoiding wierd men, so many situations require a wingman
Randomize
