Sorry I thought I was a lizard earlier.
I'm sorry..where i come from learning how to exploit a wealthy middle aged man is a right of passage
I slept with some guy because he drew a dinosaur on my arm
I'm so horny
I have no idea who this is, but I'm up for a lecture on self-respect
In fairness it was pretty good sex, but I still wasn't expecting the mass cheering and applause he got on leaving my tent
He said I did a backflip off the thing on the doorframe and busted my ass. I'd give anything to remember
I just tripped out to the Angel of Music from Phantom of the Opera in my car. Wayyyy to high for shuffle right now.
He's the conductor of the struggle bus
I RODE THAT FINE PIECE OF STRUGGLE BUS
I'm going through our high school yearbook trying to find what boys I want to hook up with this summer. We graduated four years ago. That's a problem.
So the TSA can feel me inside and out in front of 40 people, but they catch me fucking in the bathroom 20 feet away and all of a sudden their the decency police
You knocked on your freshman year room door, told the kids who opened it "I own you", and attempted to force-feed them everclear.
I'm bringing home frosties. I need to talk about butt stuff.
you bet i'm gonna rock his four-foot-two world.
We need to know if his feet match his cock.
Just got an email from match.com trying to match me with My ex..I nearly pissed myself laughing
Randomize
