Mr ***** is in bed with his super hot wife giving her 18 inches of pleasure
So I ate yogurt with the back of my toothbrush. I feel like I've officially been initiated into college.
God gave me these boobs for a reason other than for people to throw things down them.
I feel like Tiger Woods should send Jesse James a gift basket or something...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There was a community pot of Ramen, and if you were in the pool you were either fully clothes or ass naked.
being pregnant is like rehab
I sobered up in the middle of it, that I was hooking up with him in a rosemary bush. I woke up smelling like a pasta dish
Full disclosure. I fucked the fatty from work and shit is weird now.
well a fat roach just fell out of my hair. so there's that
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My girlfriend is pregnant with her exs baby. 2014 just became the worst year
there's people who respect me enough not to bang on my bed and i think that's beautiful
I'm just down here gazing up into your ivory tower of nudes
Worst case: you're extra horny, have no control of your mouth or actions, and maybe murder someone. Child's play.
His cat just sat there and simultaneously bobbed his head up and down while I blew him
I got caught throwing up in my daughters princess potty... On the bright side it played a rewarding tune afterwards.
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