Should I have kids to fix a relationship??
He is an equal opportunity slut.
tonight's goal was "most regrettable decision" and you bring wine coolers?
and hes going back to rehab like me, so we have common interests
We just made a drinking game out of our chemistry review. This might explain my chemistry grade.
In my drunkeness I was planning how to throw up without my parents hearing. I was gonna go for a "run" and just throw up outside.
With me living this close to Mexico now, Tequila is just a geographical choice at this point if nothing else.
Dude you were tripping so badly we put a pretend box around your head and you spoke silently for the rest of the night. I think pterodactyls were involved.
I like making it seem like it's at least a little bit difficult to hook up with me
The horniest man in the world doesn't want sex as bad as I want pizza right now.
All I've been thinking about for the past 12 hours is sex and SEAWORLD
He'll only communicate through snapchat with pictures of him holding his cat or his dick. Bit of Russian roulette opening them in public but I did it anyway.
Sorry I punched you in the throat. You got in my way. You understand.
With a butt like mine I'll never have to pay for Netflix again.
The Royals are in the World Series. I've never drank so much in one week in my life.
Randomize
