so i hit rock bottom, god threw me a shovel. i continued to dig.
i can barely afford taco bell don't think a baby is in the budget
all i remeber is falling off a fence and banging him in the middle of the street, not sure which one gave me this cut
i will replace your cream cheese. there's enough for breakfast. you are my friend. i had guests we wanted bagels so bad im sorry. i left you notes. i love you. you have enough for a bagel or two and i will get you more. you are so pretty.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you know you made out with my sister while holding Ur girlfriends hand while she was puking in the toilet right
Apparently I was the fucked up drunk guy greeting people at the hotel in the lobby last night.
He gave me twenty cool ranch tacos and declared, drunk, " Look, I do good"
The compounded multi day delayed hangover hit me hard today, with a vengeance normally reserved for large objects that go in my ass. I don't feel good.
He made the moves first, we made out...then we folded his laundry.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Sitting naked in my bed eating leftover Mexican food drinking coors light.. Can it get any more single than this?
She started crying, nearly punched a guy, started smoking multiple cigarets backwards and broke the slide on her bong. Why do I always end up babysitting the crazy ones?
I yelled at your uterus for you.
Im riding the bus with beer in one hand and chapagne in the other. I love weddings.
If I take a couple more shots I won't even know he's a Mormon that drives a motorcycle
I think my stomach is breaking up with me. It's giving me back everything I ever gave it.
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