I had a disgustingly explicit dream last night involving myself and lil wayne.
better yet, through the bookshelves. like an intellectual glory hole
he told me he once ran a blackmarket liquor store out of his house. thats all it took for me to go home with him
There are 3 pics of me on my camera, naked, wearing only an apron, scooping ice cream.
I don't care. I'm going to fuck John's friend and it's all your fault.
Ok say I was sexually attracted to a patient who also happens to be in high school...on how many levels is that illegal? And will I actually hear the laws break when I fuck him
You kept running up to random groups of people and saying "I'm a Dallas Cowboy Cheerleader so we all have to chug our drinks!" and they all listened to you.
If I asked you to guess what I'm doing right now how many guesses would it take to get to really high eating an apple bumping techno
I saw that you sent me a photo and the first thing out of my mouth was "I swear if it's another photo of a dick poking out of a bubble bath"
Making a mobile stripper pole for the back of my truck memorial weekend. Is where dignity goes to die
It was like a square peg in a round hole... I've never seen one shaped like a stick of butter...
It's cuz all she eats is salt lick, human souls, and fast food
He's at Disney with 4 kids and I'm drinking wine from the bottle in bed at 2:45pm. Does it sound like we're compatible??
You chose shitty college football over this pussy and my cute little mouth. That's your fault.
I rewired his car so that every time he hits the gas the horn and the OnStar turn on every time he hits the brake the panic alarm goes off.
Randomize
