I have no morals, kinda like you have no standards
None
Your roommate was biting my friend last night. It was weird.
I imagine anything that isn't a dilldo attached to a jackhammer, powered by a generator won't be amazing enough for you
We made the bar tender tell us how he proposed to his girlfriend. In detail. While we made gushing noises. We are embarrassments to females everywhere
Are you scared? I basically plan on us looking like giant drunk skittles
He whinnies like a horse when he's cumming. I wish I would have known this before we got into a relationship.
czant get you from the arport. sry i found the rum. dan sucks at rumpong jusrt so yo knoqw.
"guaranteed dick" "anywhere - her room, my room, trees, couch"
Sorry that was quotes about you from the grad student.
I left my coke in the bird nest in the bathroom stall last night but I found it nest and all in my purse I love morning suprises
Gross! What the hell is that?!?
It's quite clearly a man posing erotically with multiple packages of bacon.
Well, if worst comes to worst, I have pictures of his penis that I can put on the internet
Let this be a lesson to you, parmesan cheese crumbles are not a good substitute for coffee creamer, no matter how high you are
My prof handed me back my essay on Lesbians in literature, gave me an A and then we had sex in her office. Told you she was gay.
you asked me how to turn on the ladder
After returning from the hospital with lock-jaw from getting tackle at the game. Some naked chick busted out of his room and hit him with a devastating haymaker to the jaw because he wouldn't have sex
Randomize
