he actually used the line "do you have a map, because i'm lost in your eyes" and i was to drunk to care
We had sex on my friends waterbed ..after that the whole school kept asking him if he had fun getting "sea-sick" last night.
I cannot for the life of me remember why I am holding this rabbit.
He brought a jar of pickles to the party. So now I've had beer, animal crackers, AND a pickle since noon.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Its great. Every time she starts barking i know ive got approximately 37 seconds to hide my gf in the closet and throw some clothes on
I'm sorry i ruined our friendship with a boner
Chick in class has 69 tattooed on the back of her neck. Target acquired.
My booty call just moved 2 min from my house
This has pregnancy written all over it
Whatever. I just want to indulge in this mcchicken and forget all about his tiny penis.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
the hole that the tears left- fill it with pizza
He sends me pictures of his dogs and I send him my tits, it's a win win situation
It's like sleep walking but with blowjobs
Charging my vibrator at work. Pray to god I don't forget it!!!
He started out in my roommates bed and by the end of the night was in mine, not sure how that went down. But he left happy in the morning.
I didnt know whether I was going to vomit or orgasm because I was feeling both sensations
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