I was on my way at Dorito Smoothie
Counseling BFF to break up with her BF. We will get that 3-way
Have you ever had one of those moments when you kept whispering to yourself "I'm not a slut, I'm not a slut..."?
I have come to realize that my purpose in life is less musical and more as a filter of alcohol into water.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
not saying it was a bad idea to throw an impromptu party but someone stole the microwave
He ate me out like a beaver on a tree. I've never been so scared in my life
He told me I was the only person he wanted to fuck in his rental mini van. Thats so romantic for a fuck buddy relationship.
You talked the cab driver into taking a shot from your flask at a red light because "Ray Charles would want him to"
Talk about an dramatic entrance, girl rolled up on a stolen bike and was wearing heels and a dress, through it on the ground and said "you guys want a bike?" Of course i jumped on that shit, any sane person would!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So which one of you fuckers changed my backgrounds while I was passed out to me holding a chicken like the statue of liberty?
How dare you question the sanctity of Chocolate-and-Porn day
He was awful. Hubby's was apparently epic. I suck at swinging.
You got banned for life from a $30 a night motel. What are you doing with your life?
Sorry my phone died because I decided charging my vibrator was way more important
Just puked in front of a high school tour group. Based on the standing ovation, we have a solid group of freshman coming in this fall.
Randomize