ps i'm pretty sure i was blacked out when we hooked up? good thing i was w. you and not an actual diddler or an organ harvester
Hahaha. Shut up you were blacked out my ass. U were str8 mixin it up with urs truly like it was ur J-O-B
Your dad touched me again.
...So a 6 ft tall drag queen in heels I would kill for just told me I have a dunkable ass. I'm confused...but I'll take any compliment I can.
Walk-of-shaming home from Brooklyn in a Jesus costume that has "what wouldn't Jesus do" written on the robe.
Well it was 11am and we were walking to the market with red cups in our hands yelling NO JUDGEMENT at every car that passed
should i go to class, or party with a mariachi band?
meriachi band is very tempting, do they have dos equis?
at one point he couldn't find his underwear so he put on my catsuit to go to the bathroom
Im on the side of I-10 covered in sweat, cookie dough, hollandaise sauce, onion gravy, and ground beef wondering how my life I ended up here
I just wanted to warn you I have strep throat incase I gave it to that guy we both hooked up with on New Years.
I'm sure I'll run in to him again, there's only so many VA detoxes.
Everyone is out there getting real jobs and I just realized I've been "washing" my clothes with fabric softener for two months.
Woke up backwards on a recliner
Well then she has to know whoever you were kissing was in overalls because that's not a detail you just leave out.
it doesn't matter what you do now, you will forever be known as the girl who fell off the roof
nooooo! we need to brain storm. I need rebranding....what if I start always showing up with my cat or a wacky hat?
try again roofio
I'd date him. I'd date the fucking shit out of him.
Randomize
