I just hope this isn't happening Final Destination style
Travis Barker would totally be Devon Sawa in this scenario
i crashed through a building. if that counts then yes, i went out with a bang.
and do you remember when you were dressing me if i had money in my bra?
Other than a hickey from some random Canadian roller derby girl, I came out unscathed
Basically as long as the fan is pointed at my vagina i can cool off enough to sleep.
im in the library and there's this guy on a computer just staring at a google image of beer. finals week is rough.
I made out with about ten people last night. And four of them were just on the way to my car from the bar. And one was my roommate.
I got into a fight with the dude who fell asleep on my couch bc he wouldn't wake up but managed to get a lunch date set for thurs with another guy by the time he finally left. So how's your day so far?
I only drink at bars with bathrooms big enough to have sex in.
I'm sorry for getting drunk and throwing a robo-bird at you.
After the day I've had, I can't decide if donuts or fireball would be the appropriate priority.
We had sex on the tiger blanket while I was wearing my Ukrainian shirt and my ass touched the Ukrainian flag. Happy 25th Ukraine!
Well I just had a flashback of something I did in the 4th grade. Now I can't go back to sleep.
I'm texting you know although you won't get this until you wake up. the only reason you are strapped to your bed is because you were trying to fly out your window.
How many Hail Marys does a girl need to say to get some quality nudes?
Randomize
