apparently i walked up to the counter, put $30 worth of snacks next to this girl, and went 'uhh i have no money'
I found my laptop, credit card, and a bottle of Morgan all on the counter this morning. I'm scared to see what gets delivered to my house this week.
all i know is that they all tuched my pee cup last night.
My dad just knocked on my door and told me that my vibrator was too loud
i just threw up a quarter into the urinal in the bathroom at the bar. everybody else stared then cheered. that drunk
Just got the orientation leader spot. For the first two days, I will be one of the best looking guys on campus. The freshman girls will be so disappointed they settled for me when everyone else comes back.
It took 5 minutes to find my bra.. in his car.
My ex was here I looked him in the eyes when I grabbed some other guy by his belt and dragged him to a room
P.S. The slutty NASCAR driver costume will be saved and used year round for role play.
I can't come tonight. Someone took a shit in the dressing room. A.) Clean it up or B.) Kill myself. Text back with your answer.
But he's not just anonymous male genitalia anymore. I've met him, I've seen his face.
Ahh good point. I got some interesting mental pics and I'm slowly entering a "fuck it, lets do weird shit" phase sexually, but you may have already figured that out since I've been fucking you sideways and upside down a lot lately.
I was super naked---except I kept my shoes on, because I'm a lady, and I was bent over a bar.
Your grandma found me sleeping in my car this morning, and she wanted me to tell you she was going to church... Also, last night was amazing.
It's bullshittery. It's asshattery. It's complete fuckery at its finest.
Randomize
