He looks like a mix between a retired piano teacher and a cat that just swallowed a sock.
Why dose there have to be another girl there for you to do this?
its hotter. Way hotter.
Steve is enlightening me on how and why u put gerbils up your ass
filled out health questionnaire for lower premiums a little bit too honestly. Literally got assigned a life coach.
I never want a future conversation of ours to include the words "quart of semen" in it
don't leave me alone with all the disney princess sluts
doing a bong hit while wearing crest white strips...not such a great idea...
I don't want to tell anyone! People who sleep with senators either end up in porn or guantanamo
She sucks. And I almost hooked up with a clown last night
You rolled around in the grass BEFORE we went in and said it was because "ladies love that eau de earth"
She made me walk a straight line to prove i was sober enough to help carry you to the car
Knowing you it was perfect out of spite. Like. A line straighter than YOU
Trust no bitch in laser tag. Not a single one.
I make him buy me all the extremely expensive high end Mac cosmetics I desire. Wear it then let him cum on my face. I am fucking glamorous.
Dude on a beach in sicily and a blonde jesus just smoked us out and then tried to makeout with me I am never leaving this place
All I'm saying is Europe has not been easy on my vagina.
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